


You Set Me Free

by lapetitesinge



Category: Dexter (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-24
Updated: 2011-08-24
Packaged: 2017-10-23 01:05:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/244546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lapetitesinge/pseuds/lapetitesinge
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SPOILERS for the S4 finale [but I guess that's old news now]. As Rita prepares to leave for their belated honeymoon, she thinks about how everything happened out of order, and yet turned out just right.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Set Me Free

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the prompt "cut free, all ties unbound" at LJ.

_“Hey, sweetie. I’m a dope—I was in such a rush to get Harrison organized that I forgot my ID for the plane, so I’m zooming home for it. Means we’ll be on a later puddle-jumper, but we’ll still be there waiting for you. Oh, and I know you’re not into this stuff, but the moon tonight is gonna be amazing. So take a moment, you deserve it. I love you. Bye.”_

It’s absurdly perfect that she would forget her ID at a time like this, she thinks. Nothing in her life ever seems to quite according to plan: she’s heading off on her first real honeymoon with a baby in tow and without her husband—her  _third_  husband, the one who should have been her first and only. Her first marriage wasn’t by the book, either; a shotgun wedding with no angry father there, and with no baby to show for it anyway. She’d told her mother over and over that she was sure it was a false positive, but she wouldn’t listen, she just kept insisting they had to “make it right before anyone found out.” With Paul, the baby was real, but the love wasn’t; she’d thought she could fix him and realized too late that she couldn’t and shouldn’t try. And with Dexter, it was all out of order—the sex came late, but the baby still came first, then the wedding, then the honeymoon. Hell, she’d almost missed their very first date: Deb had set them up, of course, and Rita had just been pulling into the parking lot of the restaurant when her phone had rung: “Shit, I’m sorry! It’s on 16th  _Terrace_ , not 16th Street. These fuckin’ street names, man, can’t they just name ‘em after trees or something, for Chrissake?” But she’d made it to the right place, and so had he, and everything had been different from that night on. Despite everything, despite a million different ways they could’ve been kept apart, they still found each other.

It’s not like everything’s been a fairy tale, though. He has his demons; she’s known that all along. But somehow, with him, it’s OK. This time, she knows his flaws and accepts them; in the past, she’d try to pretend they weren’t there. She’d never had an actual honeymoon before, and yet she’d thought the honeymoon phase was the real thing. It’s Dexter who made her realize she deserves better, something deeper, something flawed and imperfect and all the more real and beautiful for it. Paul just made her feel older because she practically had to mother him as well, cleaning up after him and forgiving him over and over. Dexter makes her feel more  _mature_ , like a real woman who has earned something solid, but also like a girl again, an excited teenager who’s fallen in love for the first time. He makes her feel safe, but not just because she knows he’d always protect her and defend her. It’s because she knows how to protect  _herself_  now. He’s made her realize that she’s worth it. That’s why she can’t be too upset about missing the plane; it’s just another silly imperfection in her life. It doesn’t matter how she gets there, because the destination is all worth it.

She feels free with him, for the first time, free to say what she wants, free to trust him with her heart and with her—their—children, free to really let her guard down for the first time. With John and with Paul, she felt tied down by them, shackled to them for the wrong reasons. With Dexter, it’s the best kind of bond. They make each other better.She shifts Harrison onto her hip as she searches under the piles of newspaper and crayon drawings on the counter until she finds her ID, and slips it into her pocket. Maybe she’ll call ahead and see if they have some sort of all-night café at the resort where she can surprise him with a midnight dessert. She still loves these sort of impulsive little romantic things. “Are you ready to go on the plane?” she asks the baby as he plays with her hair. She kisses his head. “Come on, let’s go see Daddy.” She shoulders her bag, and as she reaches for her keys, there’s a knock at the door.

“Mrs. Morgan?” She doesn’t know the man; he’s not from the neighborhood. He’s tall, with white hair and a genial smile that doesn’t quite reach his blue eyes. 

“Yes,” she says, and reflects for just the briefest moment that it still gives her a little thrill of happiness to say it. “Yes, I’m Mrs. Morgan.”

***

Later, at the end, her last thoughts are of Harrison, and of Astor and Cody, and of Dexter, and how they don’t deserve this. Somehow, it’s like she’s let them down. Her family has lost so much; sometimes her only comfort was that she knew that  _she_  would never leave them. She was the one tie that could never be cut. 

He’s still there, but she’s not aware of him anymore. All she can see is Harrison, and the moonlight streaming in from the other room. It really was a beautiful moon that night. She thinks of Dexter, and she hopes he heard her message and had one last happy moment, and then everything is gone.


End file.
